Thursday, December 23, 2010
Bluette
Justin had a fish several years ago. He was a Beta and his name was Blue. Justin got Blue on his second birthday because we had a Finding Nemo party for him where everyone went home with a fish. Blue survived a few months and then met with an untimely death when Justin (then 3) dumped the whole can of food in the fishbowl. John tried to rescue him but the fast transfer to freezing cold water might have been too much for the little guy.
Earlier this month, Justin gathered up his money and he decided to go to Petco and get a fish to bring home. I gave him a budget to work with and he went to the store with Nana (who was under strict instructions not to supplement the shortfall in his budget if there was one!). He came home with a receipt showing that he had followed the rules and successfully purchased a fish, a tank, fish food, decorations, a net, and chlorine treatment for the water.
Justin took excellent care of his new pet and I was very proud of him! I am always nervous when it's time to change the water in the tank because there are a million things that can go wrong. Justin did that job all by himself the first time under the watchful eye of Gran and Grandad so I decided to stay out of his way when he did it again. Unfortunately, the second time proved fateful. I'm not sure what happened because the fish survived the transfer, the cleaning, several hours in a glass, and the return to the tank. We don't have a cat, and I don't think Jasmine bothered her, but I wonder if a child tried to "rescue" the fish from some non existent drama at some point because when I looked at her a few days later, her fin was missing. Anyway, we laid "Bluette" to rest in our back yard on December 23rd, 2010.
Justin performed the ceremonies and said a few loving words for his dear, departed fish. He says he's not ready to get another fish just yet because he doesn't want to risk another animal's life. That child has a heart of gold! I've assured him that he is a responsible pet owner and encouraged him to try again. I am hopeful that another fish joins our family sometime soon.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
The Horah
Justin spent the past few weeks talking about "a dance" that he was learning at school but I never really focused on what he was telling me. I assumed that it was something that they were doing in gym class and I had a flashback to his second grade experience where he had to learn how to Do-Si-Do. He was not a fan...
After weeks of talking about it, as he was getting ready for school on the morning of the 15th, he reminded me that he needed a blue shirt to wear to the performance. I, of course, got irritated because I didn't know ahead of time and I had a serious "Mom Talk" with him about being responsible and planning ahead. He listened to the whole tirade, got a happy little smile on his face, and he calmly said to me, "Mom? Do you remember the yellow piece of paper that Ms. Hansen sent home?" Crow tastes better warm...
Justin danced The Horah with his third grade buddies and when they were done, they watched the other third graders perform a dance in celebration of Kwanza. Both dances were amazing and I watched (of course) with tears in my eyes along with the other sappy moms that I have recently gotten to know. The part I will always remember the most is that when the dance ended, they had to rush as a group to the front of the stage. Justin did his signature "knee slide" and purposely beat the other kids to the center so that he would be sitting right in front of the microphone. Always the ham...
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Coach Lisa
Soccer Season has come and gone. I've turned in my clipboard and I most certainly miss my Pixies! The season was a challenge for me, but then again, I guess that you never fully realize at the time that you have been given a gift while in the midst of something difficult.
Coaching for me was a challenge that I knowingly accepted. I knew it would be hard but I hoped that it would be rewarding. I volunteered at about the time we arrived here in San Diego, when I thought Justin would not play football for the season, and when I was looking for an activity to help me ease into deployment life. The season for me was spent learning how to manage my time, the expectations of parents, the tender hearts of little girls, learning a sport I had never played, and finding the courage to stand strong against veteran coaches. It's tough out there trying to do your best and knowing that there are 30 sets of eyes staring you down and always assuming that they could do better!
My team was made of 5 amazing girls. Jessie was my competitive spirit who did not like to give up the chance, at any time, to score a goal. Whenever she was out on the field, I could relax knowing that we would score sometime within the next few seconds. Marissa was my little lady who amazed me with her smile, charm, and SKILLS! She could "trap and turn" better than any other 4 year old I saw out there. Lily was a gift to my team because she was a constant. She never complained and she never asked "why" ... she just attacked the ball, did her best, and kept her team strong. I know that she will change the world someday with the competive compassion that I saw in her every time she played. Keila touched my heart more than I ever could have imagined. She started the season telling me that she didn't want to play soccer. She wasn't interested in being on the field very much when we played our first couple of games, but somewhere along the line she most certainly got the bug! Her biggest concern by the end was that she didn't get to play all four quarters of the game. From then on, she spent her time on the field listening to whatever I had to say and trying anything I asked her to. This change of heart was my biggest reward of the season and I will never forget having had the opportunity to introduce her to what may become a lifelong activity. Finally, there was my sweet little "Angelface!" (Rest assured that "Sassypants" was also on the team a fair amount of the time). Honestly, Annalise was a dream to have as the Coach's Kid. She took the backseat to her teammates whenever I needed her to and she realized that she set the tone for everyone else. She tried hard to show up with a positive attitude and she did not complain when someone else had my attention. I loved having her by my side to support me in this very challenging role. As a soccer player, she sure is fast!!! She spent most of her time either defending the goal or sprinting down the field with the rest of the girls several steps behind her. She's going to be an amazing athlete when she grows up!
Yes, it was hard, but this experience was a gift in many ways. I learned about being a role model to 5 year old girls, about the importance of imagination, about accepting the facts when you need help, and most certainly about the importance of trying my hardest even when it seems like I just can't do it! Guess what? I can.
Monday, October 11, 2010
5 Year Old Girl
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My sweet baby girl is five...
Today we got to spend the day together, just the two of us, and I realized how fast she's growing up. As she reaches for her independence, she continues to show the same amazing traits that I've seen in her since the day she was born. She is a beautiful girl with the grace that few others can match. When she dances, her legs look so strong and her toes point so beautifully at the end. When she plays soccer, she can run faster than anyone else on the field. She does not allow herself to be less than perfect and when she sees an opportunity to grow, she will challenge herself. She is an artist and nothing seems to stifle her creativity. She still does not seem to embrace any threats to her physical safety. If something strikes fear in her, she will often choose a different activity. The broken down tricycle remains the preferred method of transportation even though her shiny pink two wheeler is parked next to it. She is the life of the party and she often works to remind us that she is now, and intends to remain, the center of attention.
While she is bold and fearless in many things, she has a timid heart that makes mine melt. We were at the bookstore today, which is one of her favorite places to be, and she lost sight of me for a moment. She did not cry or complain, but she quickly found me and held on to my hand tighter than I recall her doing for quite some time now. She asked me, "Where were you, Mommy?" I assured her that I was watching her the whole time and that I will never let anything happen to her. She gave me the sweetest little kiss on the cheek and asked for lunch to let me know that she had moved past the doubt.
We shared a brownie at a table outside of the bookstore and we enjoyed a quiet afternoon together. She was dressed in her Ariel costume and she certainly enjoyed it when the other grandparents in the store stopped to tell her how beautiful she is. She asked to go to Build-A-Bear and I obliged. She knew that we would not be buying anything but she enjoyed picking out accessories and outfits for quite a while and begrudgingly declined the basket that someone offered her because she knew that none of the treasures were going to leave the store.
My little girl is growing up and that's equally amazing to my mind and hard on my heart. I pray for her to keep her character and confidence while she explores the world and continues to grow even faster than she does today. I pray to keep the easy love I share with her so that she knows that while friends become increasingly important, I am still here to love and guide her along the way. I pray for her to find a way to nurture her gifts because she has so many of them and I have faith that the years will bring joy to her life while adding pride to mine.
I love you sweet girl...
Friday, October 1, 2010
Panther Pride
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Is there any debate that Justin MIGHT be excited about finally playing football? After he left practice on Friday night, he rode home dressed head to toe in his football gear. Since he got to ride in the front seat, he claims he wore his shoulder pads for "extra safety" and that if Dad were driving, he would have been wearing his helmet too! We came home and made dinner, which was eaten while wearing shoulder pads, and then he put his helmet back on to watch TV. He eventually got out of his gear, folded it neatly in a pile near his bag, and then headed upstairs for bed.
It's been very hard to watch Justin sit out this season due to the broken arm but I know that he's learned so much more about sports and life through the process than he ever could have by doing drills. With that said, he gets to play next weekend and I am over the moon about it because, after all of this bench sitting and "water boy" duty, it's certainly time! He has been very patient and I do not remember a single complaint about having to sit on the sideline that went beyond, "It's a bummer...I can't wait to PLAY!" My appreciation goes out to his coaches who have welcomed him, taught him from the sidelines, chatted with him about his Dad, and helped him understand that he's a valuable part of the team even while he can't play.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
One More Day
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I often find myself wishing for "just one more day" because, if it's a good day, I'll wish for a repeat, and if it's a bad day I am most obviously going to wish for a do-over. When I look back on this particular day though, I don't know yet if I would want to experience it again. I think maybe I will just let this one be...
Our last day with John was a blissfully normal day. We took the kids to school, John went to work, and I puttered around the house. We were lucky enough to have two of the VonBergens in town for a race so we spent some of the afternoon at the track watching Zachary practice. We ended the day with a trip to Bento for a sushi dinner where Randy and Jennifer promised they would take care of us while John's gone. I am comforted because I have faith that they will. When the sun went down, we walked next door for some ice cream from Cold Stone to enjoy at the fireplace where we've spent many evenings as a family. The biggest event of the day was that Justin got to wear pads to football practice for the first time and John was here to see it. We all did a very good job of being casual and normal while always knowing in the back of our minds that each second mattered. We hated to look at our watches and that's always hard on the soul.
John left on Saturday morning and I had a hard time at the airport. I had been as brave as I could be but when I saw his sea bag, I turned into a blubbering mess. The poor United attendant took one look at me sobbing and said, "Oh don't worry honey! We'll get you a gate pass!" God Bless him. We went through security with John and the normal routine of putting a family of four through the metal detectors got me righted again. John went for breakfast and he got me coffee so I felt myself slowly regain control of the little things. Eventually I felt brave enough to go home without him. When it was time, I got up and walked away from him, with a kid holding each of my hands, and I never looked back to see if he was doing OK. I know he was sad but I also know he's strong and brave and, most of all, that he trusts me with all he has. I don't know what was in his heart right then but I know I would crumble if I had to stand there and watch the kids walk away. He is, most certainly, a hero to me.
The rest of Saturday was a blur. I left the airport, dropped Justin at the football field, coached a soccer game, took photos of the football game, and finally brought the kids home to rest. I have been given many things in my life and my friends are a gift I treasured more than ever that day. Old friends called or texted to let me know that I was in their thoughts and my new friends were here in person to help me through it all. I got a good, strong "Navy Mom Hug" from a friend at the soccer field which gave me strength to get through the game. My Football Mom friend gave me bright yellow flowers which made me smile whenever I would walk into the kitchen. My Neighbor Mom friend gave me a smiley face bottle of wine and some kisses from her baby to bring back the joy. My family, both mine and John's, was there every step of the way to help us through the day. Thank you all, each and every one of you.
Justin and Annalise seem to grasp at odd times what is going on. Like me, I'm sure they are caught by surprise from time to time when they realize that John has a much longer commute than normal when the whistle finally blows. Justin heard me say "thirteen months" one day this week and he said, "Mom. Did you know that thirteen months is longer than a year?" Annalise tells people out of the blue that her Daddy is at work, in the desert, or in Qatar and she's very happy when they acknowledge her. They listen to him sing his song on the digital frame each night and they often draw pictures for each other showing Dad in some version of playing a game with them. They are behaving in school, both are being being strong and brave, and they have all of my respect for being so willing to stand with John and I in this choice we have made to live a military life. I know they are proud and I am just as proud of them.
As I look back, I don't think I want to repeat or redo the past few days because they were honestly too hard on me. I am thankful for them though because it brings perspective back to me and reminds me that, even if things don't always seem perfect, I have more love and joy in my home than I ever thought possible.
Monday, September 13, 2010
Family Photos
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How often do you kick your shoes off and run through a fountain fully dressed? Not often enough...that's how often!
A friend from school (a fellow Kindergarten Mom) took some family shots for us tonight. I'm not sure how it happened, but as she was clicking away I wound up climbing fences, hanging from monkey bars, jumping off of tables, spinning, and running fully dressed through a fountain! The evening was topped off by our normally conservative family of four streaking from the car to the house before settling in for some Monday Night Football. I hate to consider what my mother would say or what my neighbors are thinking!
These are two teasers from the collection but I'm saving the best for later when I decide what I want to do with them.
Photography Credit: Erin McGinty Kelly (Available through referral and Facebook). Highly recommended for artistic ability, effective family therapy, creativity, and a darn good time.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Family Birthday
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As if I ever need to have an excuse to get presents!!!
After trying to explain to Annalise that we could celebrate her birthday early if she wanted to so that John could be here with us, I saw quickly that I was heading into a downward spiral. She would then ask, "Will he be home for Justin's birthday because his isn't until next year?" I'd try to explain calendar years versus timeline years and get a blank stare back. Justin realized early on in the conversation that John would be gone for his birthday and naturally asked about mine. The worst worry they had was how lonely Daddy would be on his birthday - they were puzzled about how to fix that one. A couple of ideas were floated and my favorite one was to send a pet (not Jasmine) in the mail to snuggle him.
The best answer became clear very quickly. We decided to host a family birthday so that nobody would miss anybody else's special day! Everyone got a present and we each had a quarter of the cake decorated with a different color. We each had candles to show the birthday that we would miss and I think the kids started to understand what was going on. Justin, who admittedly understands much more than his sister these days, decided to make the most out of the event and he told me he would be adding a "1" to his piece so that he could turn 19. I don't think so...
After we opened presents, John and Justin rocked out to the new Guitar Hero and Justin mastered the basics of 80's Hair Band music. Annalise has been waiting and waiting for a DS for as long as we can rememeber. I told her that she could ask for one when she turned 5 because that's when her brother got his. As I'm sure you can imagine, her face lit up when she opened the PINK DS! I got a fitted Broncos Jersey (47 - John Lynch) which made me so happy because I've always had one that makes it look like I am carrying a backpack or smuggling a child underneath it! John opened his present to find yet another camera. He asked for a small one that he could take with him but he looked quite underwhelmed to open such a puny thing after getting to play with a professional lens all day long! Poor Guy...
I've met many wise Navy Wives in my time and one of them told me to forget about what the calendar says and to celebrate when you can. I can honestly say today that wiser words have never been spoken.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Pixie Hollow
It's funny how, even when I think I don't want it to, my hand just seems to have a pre-programmed reflex to shoot up into the air whenever someone asks for a volunteer. I almost always enjoy the job after I've gone through the intial phase of wondering, "What have I gotten myself into THIS time?"
...and so it goes with soccer...
The first question you might want to ask a soccer coach would be something like, "Have you ever coached soccer before?" I have not. The next obvious statement might be, "Oh, so you played soccer. Was that in school or on a recreational league somewhere?" I have not played soccer. Ever. Not in a pick-up game, not in a coached game, not ever. In fact, when I mentioned to Stacy that I was coaching, her first response was to laugh right out loud before asking, "You? Soccer?" (Really, she's not a mean person! She's just seen me attempt to play team sports on several previous occasions).
Pixie Hollow
The lucky team to have me picked as their coach is Annalise's U-5 Soccer Team. They are a hopelessly adorable group of girls who love to giggle, kick, and run around playing Tinkerbell on the soccer field. I love them to death because they don't really care that I can't play soccer. They love that I play Tinkerbell with them and give them Fairy Dust before each practice. Annalise looks forward to practice each week and I think she's going to enjoy the sport more than I ever could have imagined.
So far we've had two practices and it's generally chaos each time. I've managed to teach them how to dribble, where to dribble, and to avoid hand contact with the ball. They have a good shot at getting a goal whenever they have the ball and our next challenge is to convince them to spread out far enough from each other to avoid smashing their Pixie Wings. Once they have that down, I think they're going to be a darn good team!
Our games start on September 11th (in time for Daddy to see her suit up in her green uniform one time before he goes). Watch for photos and send lots of good Tinkerbell thoughts her way!
Monday, August 16, 2010
The Cast Removal
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Today was the day!!! Justin woke up and bagged his arm for the bathtub one last time. When I dropped him off at school he let me know that he would try to enjoy his last day in a sling but he kindly requested that I not be late picking him up for the appointment!
We took some final pictures to remember the cast and then we headed to Children's Hospital for the big event. He got a little bit nervous when they turned on "the chainsaw" and headed toward his arm - so they stopped to talk about it for a minute. He asked some questions and then timidly held his elbow out for the action. The noise started, the giggling started, the "reverse pliers" came out and ...the ...horrendous ...sweaty ...rotton ...gym sock ...SMELL overcame us! WOW! That is some stinky stuff in there! Some of the cotton stuck to his arm and they advised him not to pick at it because his skin was likely to come right off with it!
We took some final pictures to remember the cast and then we headed to Children's Hospital for the big event. He got a little bit nervous when they turned on "the chainsaw" and headed toward his arm - so they stopped to talk about it for a minute. He asked some questions and then timidly held his elbow out for the action. The noise started, the giggling started, the "reverse pliers" came out and ...the ...horrendous ...sweaty ...rotton ...gym sock ...SMELL overcame us! WOW! That is some stinky stuff in there! Some of the cotton stuck to his arm and they advised him not to pick at it because his skin was likely to come right off with it!
His elbow was stiff and his wrist was flopping around all over the place. He asked for the sling again and he rested his arm in it while we waited for X-Rays. He's a pro at that step these days! We got the X-Ray and headed over to the exam room to wait and see which doctor would come see us. (There are two friendly ones and one that we're scared of). We lucked out with a visiting nurse but she took the "scare the pants out of the Mom" approach and even asked if we wanted to put the cast back on!!! I DON'T THINK SO!!!!
He came home with a splint that he has to wear most of the time and we're going back in 4 weeks for one last checkup. His bone has formed around the break but there's still a little crack in there. Looks like football will wait a little bit longer (which we expected) but the pool is open!
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Third Grade
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The Third Grade Story
Justin started Third Grade sporting a blue cast covering every last inch of his left arm from shoulder to knuckles. He's been a trooper about it and hasn't complained at all but we know it's a drag. His biggest worry at school is that one lady on the "recess police" told him that he couldn't play Wall Ball unless he had a permission slip from his parents. (This came as a bit of a surprise when I asked the front office about the policy, but...what can you do?) John wrote him a note and everything has been OK since then. He assures me that he will probably be an excellent Wall Ball player when his cast comes off since he's been practicing for so long with only one hand. "Just imagine how good I'll be when I can use both of them to hit!"
As you know, football is also a large part of his life and the cast has caused a bit of a problem there. We started out the season thinking he would miss everything, but the Panthers have welcomed him back with open arms. He's been patiently sitting on the sidelines with us watching practice for several weeks now. I have enjoyed the time with him because I have had a very rare opportunity to hear his view on practice. He sat next to me one night explaining how tackles work and he watched a drill with great passion telling me things like, "See that guy? He'll get the tackle because he's low enough. That guy is going down because he was going too slow." He was right every time! Another night he told me, "I just feel more at home on a football field than anywhere else."
Before school started he was looking forward to seeing some of his friends from 1st Grade. Sadly it seems as though those friendships have faded somewhat since he is no longer in the Spanish Immersion program. From what I can tell, this doesn't seem to be bothering him. I've noticed that he's made several new friends already that he's also very lucky to have a couple of Navy kids in class with him so he's not the only new guy in town. He also has a "new kid" in his class that he knew from flag football so life is good for the kid!
I spent last Thursday afternoon in his class and I got to see how life works in third grade. Mrs. Hansen has a very quiet demeanor and I wondered how she would get along with my "larger than life" son when I first met her. It took one afternoon for me to see that she's got it completely under control! It seems to me that she's taken a "real life" approach to her classroom and she uses money as well as natural peer pressure to keep everyone moving in the right direction. They get Mountain Lion Bucks for making the right choices and they have to pay her when they forget. She also uses clapping rhythms and little verses (Example: "Check your eyes, check your hands, check your spine" when she wants them to listen) to get everyone's attention. Her favorite trick seems to be to wait them out when she has to. The kids govern themselves by "shushing" the other kids who don't seem to notice that she's waiting. After spending one afternoon in her class, I've tried some of her tricks here at home and I'm amazed at how well they actually work!
Justin's class has a student government and Justin is a Council Member. There are several jobs that are elected positions. He ran for Mayor but says he's very happy to have lost to his math partner (even though she's a girl). He says she's very nice and very smart. John and Justin worked on his campaign speech together and he practiced several times at home with us. I think he did a great job!!!
And the best news of all is that we have an appointment for TOMORROW afternoon to get that dumb cast off!! Cross your fingers for our little guy because he's READY to try life without it again. We're hoping for a quick clearance from the doctor so that he can start conditioning and get ready for his first few games. The first game is September 11th and we're hoping he can suit up once for his Dad to see.
Justin's Campaign Speech
"My name is Justin Dolby and I am running for Mayor. One of the reasons I think I would be a good Mayor is because I am trustworthy. I always try to do the right thing. I can keep a promise. I am also caring. I will always listen to your problems and try to help you with them. I am responsible because I have had a pet dog for many years and I help take care of her. When I make a promise to do something I will do it. I am a leader and I like to be a role model.
As your Mayor, it is my goal to make this the best class at Salt Creek Elementary. We will make sure that we learn a lot and HAVE FUN at the same time! I am always willing to help you with your work when mine is done. With me as your Mayor, I know we can get the most Gotcha’s in the entire 3rd grade! So, please vote for Justin Dolby to be your Mayor."
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Kindergarten
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(Note: Here we have an appearance of the "Flapper Girl" headband)
Writing her name in rainbow colors
Lots of Kindergarteners singing and flapping their arms
In her continued pursuit of freedom and independence, Annalise is having a hard time acknowledging anything we say that she does not like. With this in mind, she has invented the Language of Bird, which has been helping her out tremendously. Here's how it works:
Mom/Dad: "Annalise? Did you finish your vegetables?"
Annalise: silence...
Mom/Dad: "Annalise? Did you finish your vegetables?"
Annalise: more silence...with some fidgeting added to the mix
Mom/Dad: "Annalise, please answer when I'm talking to you."
Annalise: silence...fidgeting...and now high pitched, singsong whistling to go with it...
Mom/Dad: "Annalise!"
Annalise: "What?!?!?! That was 'Yes!'...IN BIRD!" followed by the rolling of the eyes
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Can you believe it? Annalise is in school!!!! She had her first day of Kindergarten on Wednesday, July 21st. I'm thankful that parents were invited to spend the day with them in the classroom because we got to see the routine and understand what they would be doing all day. Her teacher, Mrs. Johnston, was wearing white lace sneakers and a long denim jumper. I couldn't help but smile because it seemed like the perfect outfit for a kindergarten teacher to be wearing.
Let me just say that it was a full house in the Kindergarten wing that day! They had two classes in the same room for carpet time (along with teachers and two parents per child) but the kids seemed to enjoy it. Annalise made friends with several girls and she was generally smiling the whole time from ear to ear. She joined in the writing and reading exercises and she sat like a generally well behaved child on the carpet. (We are scarred from the many calls we've received about her older brother's carpet time antics and we were fearing the worst.) The only drama from the day came when we had a wardrobe malfunction. It seems that her headband served much better as a toy than accessory and she played with it nonstop. She was, however, very fashion forward and she turned it into a Flapper Style headband for the majority of the day. It looked cute on her, I must admit.
Since school started, Annalise has had some ups and downs. She started out strong but then she had some trouble when she realized how much she misses her friends from Rhode Island. There were two days in a row where she cried her little eyes out and I had to push her, heartbroken, into the classroom. We talked at length about Brynn and Gwen when she got home and she now carries a picture of the three of them with her whenever she can. I think she's comforted because I have reassured her that they will always be her friends regardless of where we live.
On Wednesday of this week I got to spend the whole day volunteering in class. The kids were working on writing the sentence, "I see a red ___." Their assignement was to fill in the blank by sounding out the name of whatever abstract item they had painted the previous day. Here's a bit of a shocker: The exercise didn't go very well. I spent the whole time helping them learn how to hold the pencil as well as helping them "remember" what random thing they had painted since I was having difficulty differentiating between a man, a car, an apple, or a tree in their red blob pictures. Mrs. Johnston regrouped and had us write the letters for them in yellow so that the kids could trace the words. (By the end of the year, California has decided that our 5 year olds need to be writing full, descriptive paragraphs - I'll be holding my breath if you care to join me).
Life at home for our Kindergarten girl...
Let me just say that it was a full house in the Kindergarten wing that day! They had two classes in the same room for carpet time (along with teachers and two parents per child) but the kids seemed to enjoy it. Annalise made friends with several girls and she was generally smiling the whole time from ear to ear. She joined in the writing and reading exercises and she sat like a generally well behaved child on the carpet. (We are scarred from the many calls we've received about her older brother's carpet time antics and we were fearing the worst.) The only drama from the day came when we had a wardrobe malfunction. It seems that her headband served much better as a toy than accessory and she played with it nonstop. She was, however, very fashion forward and she turned it into a Flapper Style headband for the majority of the day. It looked cute on her, I must admit.
Since school started, Annalise has had some ups and downs. She started out strong but then she had some trouble when she realized how much she misses her friends from Rhode Island. There were two days in a row where she cried her little eyes out and I had to push her, heartbroken, into the classroom. We talked at length about Brynn and Gwen when she got home and she now carries a picture of the three of them with her whenever she can. I think she's comforted because I have reassured her that they will always be her friends regardless of where we live.
On Wednesday of this week I got to spend the whole day volunteering in class. The kids were working on writing the sentence, "I see a red ___." Their assignement was to fill in the blank by sounding out the name of whatever abstract item they had painted the previous day. Here's a bit of a shocker: The exercise didn't go very well. I spent the whole time helping them learn how to hold the pencil as well as helping them "remember" what random thing they had painted since I was having difficulty differentiating between a man, a car, an apple, or a tree in their red blob pictures. Mrs. Johnston regrouped and had us write the letters for them in yellow so that the kids could trace the words. (By the end of the year, California has decided that our 5 year olds need to be writing full, descriptive paragraphs - I'll be holding my breath if you care to join me).
Life at home for our Kindergarten girl...
In her continued pursuit of freedom and independence, Annalise is having a hard time acknowledging anything we say that she does not like. With this in mind, she has invented the Language of Bird, which has been helping her out tremendously. Here's how it works:
Mom/Dad: "Annalise? Did you finish your vegetables?"
Annalise: silence...
Mom/Dad: "Annalise? Did you finish your vegetables?"
Annalise: more silence...with some fidgeting added to the mix
Mom/Dad: "Annalise, please answer when I'm talking to you."
Annalise: silence...fidgeting...and now high pitched, singsong whistling to go with it...
Mom/Dad: "Annalise!"
Annalise: "What?!?!?! That was 'Yes!'...IN BIRD!" followed by the rolling of the eyes
Mom/Dad: "Oh...I never would have guessed that...I guess I need to learn BIRD!"
For illustration purposes, let me reassure you that she has undoubtedly mastered the skill of "The rolling of the eyes." This action is often accompanied by folded arms, a loud huff, a 180 degree turn on her heel, and then a retreat to safety with her head held high.
The Language of Bird is now commonly used in our house as a bit of comic relief as well as a good way to avoid giving an answer that someone doesn't REALLY want to give. It's magical! Half the time everyone is laughing so hard that the original offense has suddenly been forgotten. If you're not quite that lucky, you can generally distract people for long enough creating their own BIRD sentences that you think of a reason that the original problem really wasn't a problem at all. Our only issue now is that we need to remind her that BIRD is not a school approved language and that she is going to need to curb it when inside her classroom walls.
The Language of Bird is now commonly used in our house as a bit of comic relief as well as a good way to avoid giving an answer that someone doesn't REALLY want to give. It's magical! Half the time everyone is laughing so hard that the original offense has suddenly been forgotten. If you're not quite that lucky, you can generally distract people for long enough creating their own BIRD sentences that you think of a reason that the original problem really wasn't a problem at all. Our only issue now is that we need to remind her that BIRD is not a school approved language and that she is going to need to curb it when inside her classroom walls.
Friday, August 6, 2010
Denial
I've spent the last several weeks feeling a strange mix of anger and sadness, which are two emotions I don't generally waste any energy on. It's been confusing for me and I have had a hard time sitting down to write about the start of school for the kids, our return "home," football, or any of the other joys we have been experiencing recently. Quite simply, I was a little bit embarrassed by the thoughts/emotions I was having and I didn't want to share them with anybody. John asked me one day if I was ever going to update my blog and I promptly bit his head off (as any good wife would do when her husband asks if she's doing OK). I told him, "I'm having a hard time and I don't want the world to know it!" He answered, "Isn't that kind of the point of writing the way you do?" This made me mad for a few days but, as usual, I realized that he knows me very well. And that he was right.
Why though? I could not figure out what was making me so miserable!
I finally have an answer for you. It became clear to me tonight as I was reading a book called "Surviving Deployment," which was written by a Marine wife. I was suddenly provided with a great sense of comfort when chapter three told me that I'm completely normal! The author described in detail all of the feelings I have been having and and she wrapped them all up in a nice, neat bow called "Deployment Stage 1." This stage is characterized by, you guessed it, anger and denial. Let me tell you, I've spent so much angry energy recently that it's ridiculous! (The upside is that I've been running farther and faster than I have ever run before).
So I guess if you're reading this, you're going to go on a journey with me. I had planned on doing a big "Catch Up" note claiming that I've been busy, but that's simply not the truth. I've been avoiding reality. This blog is supposed to be about my kids growing up, but I suspect it will become more about me as this deployment comes and goes. It will be a crazy year but we're going to get through it with style, comedy, drama and plenty of stories ... so stay tuned! Over the next couple of days I'll finally get around to sharing all of the wonderful things that have happened to us recently and you can see how my sweet little San Diego kids are faring.
Thanks to all of you who have been wondering where I've been and I promise I'll get the pictures and stories rolling again!!!!
Lots of Love,
~Lisa
Friday, July 9, 2010
Sunny San Diego
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(All limbs are still in tact at this point)
I know, I know...we've fallen off the face of the Earth recently. I'm sorry!
Before Justin broke his arm, I left you along our road trip at Nana's House. That certainly feels like a lifetime ago! We left Nana's and drove through "my" Colorado Mountains during sunset. I was in heaven and I shared with the kids that I honestly believe God Himself lives in those mountains. It's simply magical there. We stopped in VAIL and rode the Gondola up to Mid-Vail just before it closed. The kids had a good time but they were less than pleased when the ride stopped for a few minutes and we were left hanging in the air. Hunter was getting worried but his Mom did not hesitate to take advantage of the opportunity to tease him, "Hunter? Do you think we will have to stay here all night long?" He was sweatin' it!!!!
We ate at Garfinkel's, the site of many famous "Apres Ski" afternoons and I purchased(!) a pint glass for us to take home to John. The kids had a good time testing our patience because we found seats at the very back of the restaurant near the video games and pool table. We spent the meal lovingly reminding them to "sit down," to "get off the pool table," to "stop stepping on your sibling," or to "get out of the sniper position and stop shooting everyone in sight!!!" I love Autumn's son Colin to death and I took advantage of every opportunity he gave me to spend time with him. Wouldn't you know it, he chose that evening to snuggle into my arms and be carried all the way from Garfinkel's (elevation: 10,000 feet), up the stairs to the parking garage, and all the way to the top level where the Suburban (elevation 10,200 feet) was waiting for us. Talk about a workout!
The next day we drove all the way to the Grand Canyon where John was waiting for us. I spoke to him a couple of times on the phone along the way and I noticed that he was a little "off". I thought he must be tired but I worried for a minute or two that I was talking to Autumn about super secret Navy stuff because he didn't seem pleased when I mentioned to him that we were talking about what job he might be doing next. It all came to make sense when I saw him that evening.
We parked the car and the kids tore off to check out our room just as he caught me in a huge bear hug. He was hugging me tighter than normal and I could feel his heart beating about a thousand times faster than I would have thought possible. I can't remember exactly what he said but the main idea is all that really matters. He's going on an IA to Qatar for 13 months leaving in September. He told me he had known for a couple of days but that he didn't want to tell me over the phone. That was a good choice because my waterworks started right about then and they didn't stop! I told Autumn what was going on and she was so good (as always) at just being a calm friend helping me keep it all in perspective by going about life like normal. This kind of news does strange things to a person and I remember all kinds of crazy thoughts keeping me up that night while everyone else was sleeping. The worst was when I convinced myself that I deserved this little piece of news because I had been enjoying the independence I had while John had been in Florida. By "enjoying", I mean that I liked having half the laundry to do, I had enjoyed having control of the remote, and I had been very pleased to be the sole recipient of my kids' hugs and kisses. I kept counting months in my head and wondering how exactly people do this! I was prepared for 7, 8, 9, or even 10 months but 13 just seemed like a bad joke.
So the Grand Canyon was bittersweet for me. I was so happy to see John again but I had a hard time enjoying the scenery and I spent a lot of time lost in my own thoughts.
Fortunately, Justin had an amazing time! He and John left the rest of us to do the tourist route and they went for a hike about a mile and a half down the Bright Angel trail! Justin loved it and I am fairly certain that John did too. I got them matching T-Shirts and Justin wore his for three days straight before I could talk him out of it. I hope he always remembers that day with his Dad because I know it was a special one for John.
I said Good-Bye to Autumn and the kids in Phoenix and they made it home to Michigan without any drama. After going through so much with her at my side, it was hard to let her go! I remember Hunter being a big, brave kid and lugging their huge red suitcase to the curb before getting his little sister and brother under control while I hugged Autumn and cried just a little bit more.
When we got home to San Diego, we were so lucky to have Polly and her kids here to greet us. It made my kids realize that no matter where they are, they have friends to count on and that life most certainly goes on. Polly introduced us to a new family in the area with kids to play with and she showed us a part of San Diego that was previously undiscovered by our family. We went go-kart racing and we learned about BMX (little did we know how THAT would impact our lives!) which Justin seems to love. I am reminded every day that if I will simply open my eyes and be ready for them, new experiences are waiting for me around every corner.
Our Fourth of July was spent unpacking the house. Our neighbors Sylvia, Jake, & Milo invited us over to watch fireworks from their backyard and I was so thankful to have them here to welcome us. I miss Attleboro Ave more than I can say, but I am careful to remember "Onward and Upward!" when smiling faces are waiting to greet me here as well. We also have new neighbors next door to us who are very serious bikers and they assured Justin that broken bones come with the territory. (Sidenote: We met Greg Romero when we went back to show John the track and he let Justin know that he started racing at 8, that broken bones are OK, and that getting right back to it was the secret! He told us about some classes that Justin should take when he gets better...and when football season is over).
I'll close this with the admission that I've had a rough couple of weeks and I think the kids have as well. The very bright spots have come when I've had some time with each of the kids, one on one, working to learn something new. With Justin, it was the time we spent at the racetrack and, sadly, in the hospital emergency room. With Annalise, it's been having her snuggle up on my lap and talk through how much she misses her friends while looking to me for a promise that she will make new ones very soon. Yesterday we took a walk on the Coronado Beach together and I was finally able to feel the peace I had been looking for when I looked out at the sand where we took family pictures 8 years ago. It also helped when I was reminded that the ice cream at Hotel Del is still the answer to all problems in the world.
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